I think about it for a minute. As much as I wanted to hold her through the entire ride, I knew that I had no right to touch her.
“You should stay with her. You are the only person she probably trusts now” I tell him sadly.
Joseph nods in understanding and climbs up in the back with her. I start the car and drive back towards our head pack. It was a one hour drive only.
I sneak a peek at the rearview mirror and watch Ella sleeping peacefully in Joseph’s arms. He was looking at her with such affection, it reminded me of the way he used to look at Kate.
I distract myself from the pain by asking him “What did you talk about after I left?”
“I told her about our decision to take her with us to protect her. She thought you were using that as an excuse so you could make good on your promise to make her suffer for what her father did. She hates your guts and wants nothing to do with you. She said you were worse than her old alpha”
My grip tightens on the steering wheel in frustration. Give it to Joseph to slam the truth right in my face.
“You really think I am worse than him?” I ask him carefully.
“No Klaus, you are nothing like him. But if you want my honest opinion, to her, you were worse than him. Starting from the public punishment and ending with the alpha commands. The whole thing is nothing like you”
“I honestly have no idea what came over me. There is something about her that triggered things in me I never thought I was capable of, ever since that night she stabbed me with the knife” I admitted to him. He was the only person left that I could open up to. That I could be honest with. Although I drifted away from him after Kate and my father died, but I was starting to find my way back to him.
“So all that revenge crap is really over, or are you going to bring it up again? Because I promised her that she will be safe with us, and I will not fail her like everyone did”
Ouch, that last statement was specifically directed at me, and hit the spot dead on.
“It’s over. Do you think she will ever forgive me?”
“I honestly have no idea. But I know one thing. She was pretty scared of me from the beginning, although I did nothing but be kind to her. She assumed we were like them. But after she saw how I defended her and stood up for her, she started trusting me, a little. That tells me that she never had anyone to protect her before, not even her father I presume. Do you remember what she was yelling in the backyard last night? She said ‘I hate you all three of you, I hope you are rotting in hell’ the first two are her alpha and beta. Who do you think the third is?”
“Her father”
“Yes, she hates her father as well which tells me he was never good to her when he was alive. What I am trying to tell you is, the three men that were mostly involved in her life were all dicks. She became scared of all of them. The nurse for example, as soon as she saw him, she got hysterical. What happened to her made her always assume the worst in men. Until you show her otherwise, she will never forgive you”
“wow. I feel like I am talking to your wife right now” I tease him.
“Well, being married to a therapist, you pick up a thing or two” he laughs under his breath.
“Speaking of your wife, do you think she should sit with her? She probably needs professional help dealing with her… abuse”
“I was thinking about that. I am just not sure if she is willing to confide in her. I think she is ashamed of admitting her weakness. The whole time she was talking about it, she couldn’t look at us. She didn’t want us to pity her”
“Weakness? She is nothing but weak. If anything she is the strongest person I know. No one can suffer through ten months of abuse and survive, but she did. Someone else in her place would have probably killed herself. She tried to escape the pack and would have succeeded if I wasn’t there, she tried to kill me, she suffered through her punishment without a sound even over open cuts, she fought for her life severely judging by her multiple injuries, she fought a freaking alpha command for God’s sake. There is nothing weak about this girl”
Joseph stays quiet, I sneak a look at him through the rearview mirror and see him staring at me amusingly.
“What?” I ask him.
“Nothing. You are right about everything. She is strong, but she needs someone to remind her of that”
We stay quiet the rest of the ride. I sneak peeks at her through the mirror every now and then.
I don’t know how I am going to win her trust like Joseph, but I promise myself that I will. I can’t bare the idea of her hating me or looking at me in fear. Not anymore.
Ella’s POV
WHIP!
I scream out in pain as the alpha’s whip hits me on my back for the millionth time.
“Should we move on to making me comfortable? I have been craving you since the beginning of this lovely evening” said alpha Grey with lust coloring his tone.
I cry desperately. If given the choice, I’d choose the torture over the rape a hundred times. Being violated by him makes me hate myself. It makes me disgusted of my own skin. It makes me sick that I am handing over myself to him willingly now because I have no other choice.
WHIP!
“Did you bite your tongue my little slave?” whispered alpha Grey in my ear, while pulling my head back by painfully grabbing a handful of my hair.
I sob in desperation. I have to answer him or he will keep hurting me, but at the same time, prolonging the rape and tolerating more torture would worn him out faster and cut down the number of times he rapes me later.
I cry out as his hold on my hair tightens and I feel a couple of strands snap.
“I can’t hear you. Are you provoking me on purpose?” he hissed in my ear.
“Please, don’t hurt me alpha. I can’t take it anymore” I beg him like the coward I am.
Suddenly he lets go of my hair and whips me so hard on my back. He keeps throwing one after the other, and I am trapped in the pain, powerless and weak.
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