“Why?…. Why would she…….? She left me….” Her broken tiny whimpers barely graze the air, but I hear them, and they cut me like a knife to the heart and stomach. I cover my face to wipe away the onslaught of wet waves overtaking my skin and blink at the pitiful sight of her, avoiding looking beyond at the carnage and pushing the scent out of my nostrils. Wolves around us move in and lower their heads as many begin to shed tears for their fallen kin, and the air is filled with a sadness that destroys what’s left of my sanity. A low howl begins nearby and extends to join a mournful chorus that echoes in the air around us, spreading far beyond into the forest and back towards the stead as the wolves let out their own sorrow at being too late. The sound is enough to make me crumble to my own knees and cry painfully, hugging my own body with my arms.
“Carmen, I’m sorry…. I’m so sorry.” Colton tries to hush her, his voice breaking as his own tears fall freely and drop over her lowered head like gentle raindrops. He’s stroking her hair and squeezing her tight as I stare in numb disbelief at what we failed to stop from happening, carrying the heavy weight of guilt in my heart that my mate is already bearing.
I don’t know how to fix this.
Fallout
Vampires did this and left her here in hopes we found her. The blood is fresh, I can smell it, the kill is still warm, and I can still feel the traces of her heat and her scent around me as though her soul still lingers. Feel the ebbing away of her emotions and fears in the air around us because they are still so recent and my gift homes in, tortured by what I can feel. They knew we were looking for her and yet they waited until we were close enough to kill her completely and I don’t understand why.
Was this a game to them? It feels like they were luring us out here this far for fun and I look around trying to sense if this might be a trap with so many of our kind out here, but there’s nothing. The vamps have retreated and gone and only the chaos they have caused is left behind in the air around us. No hint or traces that they are close in anyway and not even the feeling of eyes observing.
“Meadow… take Carmen and Lorey back to the house. They don’t need to be here for this.” Colton yanks my focus back to him as he instructs, and Meadow appears behind me like a sudden shadow. I note that all the other packs are now flooding in to where we are, so we’re grouped as one unit once more. Obviously, Colton linked them, and Carmen’s scream brought them zoning right in. Colton has lifted up to pull the trembling figure with him to their feet and I look away quickly as he hauls her into another hug soothingly and lets her weight rest against him. That stirring of dislike growing like a warm ember in my belly even though I know he’s only being compassionate. He’s being the Alpha, and this is no time for feeling threatened.
“Come on you.” Meadow leans in to take charge of Carmen in Colton’s arms and I realize tears are still washing down my face as I stare at them again in stupefaction. Cooling my skin as the air turns them from warm to icy cold. Hating myself that I feel inner warm relief when she’s taken from my mate’s embrace and blush with shame at my own selfishness. I’m so stupidly possessive of him sometimes that it’s not admirable.
The shock of what we have in front of us comes back into view as I stare in the direction of chaos, and it pushes my own emotions to quiet as Meadow guides Carmen past me. She seems to snap at the sudden release of his arms and makes a dart for the remains of body once more in blind hysteria. A painful sob escaping her lips, but this time I am faster and she’s closer to me than him. Meadow is startled by her sudden change of direction so that she loses grip for a second and I flash my hand up, catching her in the air, holding her steady and pulling her around, lifting her from her feet and back towards me. As soft as air and making her fly with my ability.
My gift never fails me, and I glide her to my side and hold her there as she gently meets ground once more, wide eyed and still after what I just did to her. The shock silences her completely and I release her once Meadow gets a grip on her hand and wrist in a way that signals she won’t get loose a second time
“Carmen, go home with Meadow.” Colton alpha tones her again, leaving no room for a second error and she reluctantly turns on her heel. Her skin white and damp, her eyes empty and blurred and her body sags with sheer misery. Her whole aura is that of grief.
“Lorey… come here, baby.” Colton moves to me, bringing my attention back to him as he pulls me into his arms and nuzzles me close. With one moment of attentive affection, he wipes away my brewing green eyed monster and gives me the kind of hug that no one else gets. The ‘I need you’ embrace that sweeps me up into him and holds me tighter than he held her, while burying his face in the crook of my neck. Warming my skin with his deep exhale before pulling up to look me in the eye again. I melt like liquid with his touch and allow him to wipe away my tears with gentle fingers.
I can feel his own despair at what has happened, and it weighs on me heavily.
“We need to bury her. We can’t leave her like this. Go home and wait for me there, where it’s safe, and warm, and see if you can help her… somehow. I don’t even know how. You’ve been through the loss of your mother, maybe you can …” Colton trails off at a loss, squeezes me tight, kisses me softly and wipes away the rest of my tears for me as I hug him back. Aware that most of the wolves are now moving in to see what’s been done and a couple rush to the bushes to vomit. Not all wolves can stomach things like this.
“I love you.” I breathe hastily, that inner insecurity peeking out at me because I am sometimes still that unworthy girl he rejected. I give him a second kiss, more of a grazing of lips and he nestles his forehead to mine in the way he does when he’s trying to reassure me. Maybe this time he needs me to ground him, his emotions are definitely on the needier and cast loose side than mine are.
“I can’t believe I let this happen. I feel like I failed her….. Sun’s coming, so we can do this right and lay her to rest. I owe it to Carmen and her mom to treat her with the respect of the pack….. Take two wolves as guards and go catch Meadow and get home. Don’t hang around, especially not this far outside the borders. I don’t want you around this or helping. You shouldn’t be near this… I love you, baby. Go home for me.” He sighs heavily and tightens his arms around me once more, craving me yet needing me to leave him for now. I can feel his conflicted feelings and make it easier by letting him go with a nod.
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