But Kael deserved honesty. Or at least as much as I could give him.
I carefully shielded my deeper thoughts – the confusion, the guilt, the small part of me that would always care about the man I’d loved for years – and projected only certainty through the bond.
*”I’m choosing you,”* I told him firmly. *”Not because Damon hurt me, not because I’m running away from Blackwood, but because I want to be here. I want to be Luna of Shadowmere. I want to build a life with you, whatever that looks like.”*
*”But do you love me?”* The vulnerability in his question made my chest ache. This powerful, cursed Alpha was asking me the same thing I’d been asking myself.
*”I’m falling in love with you,”* I said, and it wasn’t entirely a lie. I did care about him. Did feel something growing between us that might become love given time. *”It’s not the same as what I felt for Damon. But maybe that’s better. Maybe what we’re building is stronger because it’s based on choice and respect rather than desperate longing.”*
There was a pause. Then: *”You’re shielding part of yourself from me. I can feel it.”*
Damn. I’d forgotten how perceptive the bond could make him.
*”Some thoughts are private,”* I said gently. *”Some feelings are complicated and I need time to sort through them on my own. But
Kael – I promise you this. In two days, I will bond with you. I will accept your mark, become your Luna, commit myself to you and this pack. You have nothing to fear from Damon or from my past. I’m choosing my future. I’m choosing you.”*
Another pause, longer this time. I wondered what he was thinking, what he was feeling through our connection.
*”Thank you,”* he finally said. *”For being honest. For choosing me even though it’s complicated. I know I’m not what you dreamed of – a cursed Alpha who can’t even hold you properly. But I’ll do everything in my power to be worthy of your choice.”*
*”You already are,”* I told him, meaning it. *”You threw yourself between me and death. You’ve treated me with more respect in a week than Damon did in years. You’re letting me find my own way instead of trying to control me. That’s worth more than you know.”*
I felt warmth through the bond, gratitude and affection and something deeper I couldn’t quite name.
*”I’ll see you at dinner,”* Kael said. *”Nina’s planning something special apparently. A pre-ceremony celebration.”*
*”I’ll be there,”* I promised. *”And Kael? Thank you for trusting me. For giving me space to figure things out.”*
*”Always,”* he said simply, and then the connection faded to its usual background hum.
I looked up to find Nina watching me with knowing eyes.
“He asked if you still love Damon,” she said – a statement, not a question.
“How did you know?”
“Because I would have asked the same thing if I were him. After everything that’s happened, after seeing you interact with Alpha Cross at the border – any mate would wonder.”
“I told him I’m choosing him,” I said. “That I’m committed to the bonding ceremony.”
“But you didn’t answer the question,” Nina observed. “Do you still love Damon?”
I thought about it. About the man who’d imprisoned two women in his desperation to claim me. Who’d destroyed furniture in a rage. Who’d convinced himself he could force me into a bond I didn’t want.
“I love who I thought he was,” I said slowly. “The Alpha I imagined him to be during all those years I was devoted to him. But that person doesn’t exist. Maybe he never did. And what he’s become now – obsessive, controlling, dangerous – that’s not someone I could ever love.”
ARIA
“That’s a good answer,” Nina said. “And if Alpha Cross does show up at the ceremony, if he tries to issue a challenge or disrupt the ritual – “
“Then I’ll shut him down,” I said with more confidence than I felt. “Publicly. Finally. I’ll make it clear that I don’t want him, that I’ve chosen Kael, that nothing he does will change my mind.”
Nina smiled. “That’s my Luna. Now come on – we have work to do. If you’re going to publicly reject an Alpha during your bonding ceremony, you should probably practice what you’re going to say.”
We spent the rest of the afternoon preparing. Not just learning protocols, but crafting words I could use if Damon appeared. Statements that would be firm but diplomatic, that would shut down his challenge without causing an international incident.
By the time dinner arrived, I felt more prepared. More certain of my choice.
Whatever happened in two days, whoever showed up to challenge or disrupt – I knew what I was doing and why I was doing it.
The pre-ceremony celebration was smaller than I expected – just the core pack leadership and a few of the wolves I’d grown closest to during my week in Shadowmere. Nina had set up a beautiful dinner in one of the private dining rooms, with candles and flowers and food that smelled amazing.
Kael was already there when I arrived, his massive form somehow not out of place in the elegant setting. He’d positioned himself near the head of the table, and I saw his ears perk up when I entered.
*”You look beautiful,”* he said through the mindlink.
I’d changed into one of the nicer dresses Nina had given me – deep forest green that brought out my eyes. Nothing fancy, but better than my usual practical clothes.
*”Thank you,”* I thought back, moving to sit beside him. *”This is lovely. Did Nina organize all of this?”*
*”With some input from Eliza and the other healers,”* Kael confirmed. *”They wanted to make sure you felt celebrated. That you knew how much the pack appreciates you choosing us.”*
The sincerity in his mental voice made my chest tight with emotion. These wolves barely knew me, but they’d accepted me without reservation. Had welcomed me as their Luna before I’d even earned the title.
The dinner was warm and full of laughter. Pack members shared stories about previous ceremonies, about their own bonding experiences, about what it meant to be part of Shadowmere. I found myself relaxing into the conversation, letting the worry about Damon fade into the background.
This was my future. These wolves, this pack, this life I was choosing.
Eliza stood partway through the meal, raising her glass. “To our future Luna Aria. You’ve shown more courage and dedication in one week than some wolves show in a lifetime. We’re honored to call you pack.”
“To Luna Aria!” the others echoed, and I felt tears prick my eyes at the genuine warmth in their voices.
*”You’re crying,”* Kael observed gently through the mindlink. *”Happy tears, I hope?”*
*”Very happy,”* I confirmed, wiping at my eyes. *”I’m just… I’m overwhelmed. In the best way possible.”*
*”You belong here,”* he said with absolute certainty. *”I know the circumstances that brought you weren’t ideal. I know you’re still processing complicated feelings about your past. But Aria – you belong in Shadowmere. This pack needs you. I need you.”*
The vulnerability in that last statement made me reach out without thinking, my hand finding the soft fur of his shoulder. He leaned into the touch, and I felt contentment flow through our bond.
Maybe Nina was right. Maybe love could grow from respect and trust and shared purpose. Maybe what Kael and I were building would be stronger than the desperate, unrequited love I’d felt for Damon.
The dinner continued late into the evening, with more stories and laughter and the occasional toast. By the time people started drifting away, I felt exhausted but genuinely happy.
Nina caught me as I was heading to my quarters. “How are you feeling? Really feeling, not just the brave face you’ve been wearing.”
I considered lying, then decided she deserved honesty. “Scared. Excited. Guilty about what’s happening in Blackwood but determined not to let it derail my choice. Worried about what Damon might do at the ceremony but confident I can handle it.” I paused. “Is it normal to feel all of those things at once?”
“Completely normal,” Nina assured me. “Bonding ceremonies are intense even under the best circumstances. Add in ex-Alphas threatening challenges and imprisoned Lunas, and it’s a miracle you’re handling it as well as you are.”
“I have good support,” I said, meaning it. “You, Eliza, Kael – everyone has made this so much easier than it could have been.”
“That’s what pack does,” Nina said, echoing her earlier words. “We take care of each other. And Aria? Whatever happens in two days, know that we have your back. Every single wolf in this pack will stand between you and anyone who tries to take you against your will.”
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