“So what you’re telling me is I have a wolf’s heat cycle now? Just without the wolf part?”
“Something like that, yeah.” Ryder half laughs. “Except it’s your body’s way of syncing with us. It’s instinct, nothing to be scared of.”
I study her as she takes that in. She’s still nervous and unsure, but there’s a spark of curiosity there too. She wants to understand this, to make sense of it. Which is going to be a conversation for when Jax is in bed.
Paige’s POV **
The words swirl around my mind over and over.
A heat cycle.
I don’t even know how to process it. I’m human, and yet my body is doing something that shouldn’t be possible. I wrap my hands around the coffee cup, letting the heat seep into my skin, but it’s not enough to stop my mind spinning out. Not when Ryder is looking at me like I’m his next meal, and when Remy’s wolf is so close to the surface that I can almost feel him pacing. Parker and Callen don’t seem to be as affected. I’m not sure if that’s because I haven’t completed the bond with them or because they weren’t part of the moment we shared upstairs.
They’re all watching me though, waiting for me to react. But before I can even open my mouth, Jaxon’s voice cuts through the tension.
“Mum!”
He barrels into the kitchen with Lego clutched in his tiny hands. His grin is so wide that I forget all thoughts of heat cycles and mate bonds.
“Look! I added a booster to my spaceship. It’s going to make it super fast.”
His excitement is so bright that it eases the heaviness pressing down on me. I set my cup aside and scoop him into my lap, ignoring the lingering ache in my body as I kiss his temple.
“That’s amazing, baby. You’re going to break records with this ship.”
He smiles proudly, holding the spaceship up to point out every little detail. I listen to him talk, admiring his imagination as I run my fingers through his messy hair just to feel his warmth against me. Because this right here, him, is the only thing that makes sense right now.
Jaxon is safe. He’s happy, and he doesn’t have a clue that his mother’s body feels like it’s rewriting itself from the inside out.
I force my smile brighter. “Maybe later, you can show me how the boosters work.”
“Really?” His eyes light up, bright blue in the late morning sun. Ryder’s eyes staring back at me from a smaller, softer face.
He squints at me, his little nose wrinkling in suspicion as he presses his palm to my forehead the way I do to him to check his temperature. “Are you okay, Mummy? You feel warm.”
He’s so observant sometimes.
“I’m fine, sweetheart.” I smile, trying to reassure him.
Callen steps in then, crouching down with that easy grin he has. “Hey, astronaut, how about you and I finish this spaceship? I’ll even help you design a landing pad.”
“Yeah!” he cheers, scrambling off my lap.
Callen winks at me before following Jax back up the stairs as he rattles off ideas about laser guns. Then, just like that, three sets of eyes are on me again, and the tension in the kitchen builds.
“So… let me get this straight. You’re telling me my body’s basically copying yours?”
“More like adapting,” Parker says gently. His voice is calm, but I see the tension in his shoulders. “It’s the bond. It’s reshaping you.”
“Into what?”
No one answers right away.
Remy is the one who finally leans forward, his eyes burning with a gold tint that I’ve learned to recognise as his wolf pushing close. “Into ours,” he breathes. “You’re already ours, Paige. This just makes us more compatible.”
The way he says it makes my skin prickle with warmth and cold.
“But you said mates are already made for each other, so why do I need to change to be more compatible?”
“Maybe compatible was the wrong word. I think this is just the bond doing what it’s supposed to, think of it more like another ability,” Parker offers.
I nod, and then frown. “What benefit is this to anyone though? I mean, increased s*x drive is great and all, but for what…” I trail off as realisation dawns on me. s*x is not just for fun and to solidify relationships, especially not in wolves. For animals, s*x is for procreation. Crap.
The guys stay silent, looking a little sheepish as they watch me figure it out.
“Is there a way to stop it?” I ask, my voice coming out smaller than I meant it to.
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Ryder covers my free hand with his. “For a she-wolf, no, but you’re human, that changes so much. We’ll figure it out. You’re not alone in this.”
His words should comfort me, but instead they twist something in my chest. Because if my body is acting like a female of their kind, then what’s next?
“I’m human,” I whisper, more to myself than to them. “I’ve always been human.”
“You still are,” Parker says quickly, his steady hand coming to rest on my shoulder.
But am I? Humans don’t go into heat. Humans don’t fall apart if their mates step away for too long. Humans don’t crave the touch of four men so desperately it feels like drowning without them. Humans don’t lead wolf packs.
My heart hammers in my chest. I don’t want to lose any more of myself than I already have.
I swallow hard, forcing a weak smile. “Well… if I start sprouting fur, you’ll warn me, right?”
It works. Ryder actually laughs, a deep rumble that eases some of the tightness in my chest.
Parker shakes his head with a small grin, and even Remy looks like he’s fighting a smile.
The atmosphere feels lighter, but inside, I’m unravelling.
I sip my coffee to hide it, but the taste has gone bitter. I wrinkle my nose and push the cup away. My hands are trembling again, so I pull them down to my lap, out of view. I can’t let them see how scared I am, not when they’re already on edge, not when Jaxon could come running back in at any second. Because for him, I have to be steady. There’s been too much change for him already.
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