“He won’t give it up without killing him, and we all know that’s not on the cards, ever. His loyal will never turn and I’m not risking a single wolf’s life in a bid to fight a hopeless battle. We have enough bloodshed and upheaval. Not to mention the fact we would leave the homestead unprotected if we marched against the mountain. We don’t have enough wolves to do both at once. Our priority is and always has been the protection of this village and its people. To keep the vamps out and to keep life stable for the pups to grow and feel secure.” Colton is in protector mode; his words make sense but it’s eating me deep down inside. So torn between two halves of our pack and the night to day existence they are living. All of them deserve the relative safety and peace we have built here, and my heart wants to chase them down and bring them all home.
“There are children on the mountain who have no choice but to stay. Do they feel safe… are they safe? Or are they just pawns that Juan clings onto in a bid to feel he retains some control and would throw them to the vamps in a heartbeat to instill fear into those left.” I verbalize my frustration knowing fully that Juan never cared in any way for his people. Colton exhales heavily, letting me go as he stretches his arms out behind his head and scrubs his scalp in frustration, letting his breath out loudly as he does so and it’s not hard to tell he’s finding this stressful to talk out. Despite everything that has happened, Colton’s heart still sees his father inside the monster, and it leaves him conflicted anytime we talk about him.
“Tell me what to do…. I honestly have no fucking idea. We have a split pack. We have two vulnerable communities. Our priority should be here, but I get what you’re saying…they need us too. It’s just ……” He drops his arms and grabs my hand, shrugging as his words tail off, and I pick up on that familiar distress as his emotions war in on themselves.
“Maybe we could recon the mountain, see what’s going on. Figure out weakness, get a lay of the land and if it’s as bad as Carmen said.” Remi stands up, also frustrated with this talk, and stretches out before pacing to the edge of the room where the water coolers are and gets himself a drink. The whole sub pack is uneasy and on tenterhooks and their emotions are filling my space like a dark heavy invasion. Sometimes I curse this ability to feel people’s emotions, especially right now while I am drowning in overwhelm.
“You know we’re the fastest in the pack, we could scope it out and be back in under two hours, before dawn.” Domi agrees with his twin, a brightening glance between the two and Colton frowns as though thinking about this. His whole posture loosens slightly.
“You know that’s not a bad idea.” Cesar leans in and I know without looking at Colton that he’ll agree. He listens to his pack, especially Cesar, the wise and influential brother he never had and now with the others nodding, I can sense his caving. His sub pack have always held this power over him and with some gentle coaxing can influence him for good, no matter the topic.
“Okay, but only to scope it out, and keep your distance. Watch, report via link, and when we have enough of an idea what’s going down, I want you back here. Fast. Watch your back, be home before dark and keep in mind, the vamps have witches out there now. Be extra aware.” He commands.
“We won’t make decisions until we know for sure how things are at the mountain, right?” Meadow confirms what I’m thinking and Colton nods. Sighing again as though this whole thing has made him weary and listless. It feels like a bad dream that none of us can wake from sometimes.
“Right. We see what’s up, then we figure out our next move. I need to patrol the village and see if we can squeeze more space out of the building works for those we’ve settled in the house, today. We need to keep them moving out so we can accommodate the incoming, for now. There are still three times as many wolves at the mountain than we have here…. We need to really think about this. We’re at capacity almost and from what you said, Carmen thinks more will run soon.” Colton stands and makes it clear he’s dismissing the sub pack, ending this conversation for the time being. As though they are all somehow agreeing to leave this as is, they get up to move. I linger, waiting for Colton as they nod their respect and leave in an almost single file until only Meadow trails behind.
“I know you don’t want to fight our people again. Or him. I know how much it hurt to have to do that…. But sometimes,
Hermano, you have to do horrible things for the greater good.” She pats him on the shoulder, rubbing his clavicle with her thumb for a second before kissing me on the cheek feather soft, and departs with a sad smile. We watch her go before Colton turns his attention to me fully.
“She’s right… I don’t want to fight my people again. It was hell to do it once, I can’t even get my head around doing it again.” Colton breathes out when we are alone and his despair washes over me, tainting the air I inhale. Always at the heart of his decisions are his pack, even the ones that are not technically ours. My heart bleeds for him, a tight heavy pain that constricts my ribs, because I understand. I don’t want to hurt our people any more than he does. Most of them never did anything to deserve this.
“You heard what they said…. the people are turning. The memory being shared. I don’t think Juan has the command to make them fight like he did. Only his loyal would take up arms and they’re a lost cause anyway. When you take down the king you have to take down his circle of trust, or you leave betrayal as an opportunity. Didn’t you learn anything from the history teachers.” I nudge him lightly with my shoulder against his and he relaxes a little, that cute boy half smile coming my way as my words amuse him.
“How did I get so lucky in finding a mate who’s beautiful and smart…. You make every day easier; you know that?” Colton leans in and brushes a kiss across my lips, warmly soft and yet he still ignites butterflies; lingering a moment to rub his nose against mine and my insides melt and combust all at the same time. It never ceases to amaze me how responsive I am to his touch, and I hope it never stops being this way. Six months on and he still gives me fireworks.
“The fates knew you needed someone to keep you in hand!” I giggle, running my fingers over that squared off clean shaven jawline and melt a little when he smiles, all full-on dazzling dreamy.
“Really? Keep me in hand… I think that’s a little backwards. I most definitely run dampener on your temper sometimes, baby. My feisty headstrong Luna.” He kisses me again and I can’t say that I can argue with that, losing myself in the pressing of his lips as he lingers longer than the last one. Colton draws back without pushing it further and fixes a serious look on me.
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