Nina sighed. “There might be one option. It’s risky, and there’s no guarantee it would work. But… the moonbeam plants have been pushing back against the curse, right? Weakening it?”
*”Yes. Significantly. I’ve been more lucid, more in control than I have been in three years.”*
“What if we increased the dosage?” Nina suggested. “Really flooded your system with the moonbeam essence. It might be enough to break the curse entirely, or at least force a partial shift. Even getting your human voice back would help.”
Hope flared in my chest, immediate and desperate. *”Would that work? Could we do it before the ceremony?”*
“I said it was risky,” Nina warned. “The moonbeam plants are powerful magical catalysts. Too much could cause unpredictable reactions. You might shift back to human, yes. But you might also make the curse worse. Or cause other magical side effects we can’t predict.”
*”I’ll take that risk.”*
“For Aria?” Nina’s eyes were knowing. “Or to compete with Alpha Cross?”
Both. Neither. I didn’t know anymore. All I knew was that I couldn’t stand the thought of losing Aria because I wasn’t enough, because I couldn’t be what she needed.
*”I felt everything through our bond during that confrontation,”* I admitted quietly. *”The way she still loves him, still dreams about the life they could have had. How can I compete with that when I can’t even hold her hand? When every touch is fur instead of skin, when she can’t see my face or hear my voice except through a magical connection?”*
Nina was quiet for a long moment. When she spoke, her voice was gentle but firm.
“Aria touched you. After the nightwalker attack, when you were dying, she held you. Stroked your fur. Stayed by your side while the healers worked. I felt what she felt then, Kael. Through the pack bonds, through the concern radiating off her in waves. That wasn’t obligation. That was genuine care.”
*”Care isn’t love.”*
“No,” Nina agreed. “But it’s a start. And you’re right that she still has feelings for Alpha Cross – you’d have to be blind not to see that. But she also has feelings for you. I’ve watched the two of you this past week. The way she seeks you out through the mindlink when she’s uncertain. The way she smiles when you make her laugh. The way she defended you at the border, stood by your side against the Alpha who broke her heart.”
*”She defended Shadowmere,”* I corrected. *”Her commitment to the pack, not to me.”*
“Are you really that blind?” Nina shook her head in exasperation. “Kael, she risked her life harvesting those moonbeam plants to save you. She could have run when the nightwalkers attacked, but she stayed and fought. She remembered the plants existed when you were dying, even though she was injured and terrified. That’s not just pack loyalty. That’s – “
*”Responsibility,”* I interrupted. *”She agreed to be Luna. She takes that seriously. It doesn’t mean she loves me.”*
Nina stood up, moving to where I lay on the floor. She crouched down, placing both hands on either side of my massive head and forcing me to meet her eyes.
“Listen to me very carefully. You are spiraling. You’re convinced Aria is going to bolt, that she’s only bonding with you to spite Alpha Cross, that you’re not enough for her. And you know what? All of that might be true. Or none of it might be. You won’t know unless you talk to her.”
*”She asked for space.”*
“She did. And you should give it to her. But after? After she’s had time to process? You need to be honest with her. Tell her what you felt through the bond. Ask her what she really wants. Give her the chance to choose you – really choose you – instead of assuming she’s just settling.”
I wanted to protest, to argue that I couldn’t bear to hear her say she didn’t love me. But Nina was right. Living with uncertainty, with fear and doubt poisoning every interaction, was worse than knowing the truth.
*”And the moonbeam treatment?”* I asked. *”If I wanted to try increasing the dosage?”*
Nina hesitated. “I’d need to consult with Eliza. She’d know better than I would about magical reactions and dosages. But Kael… are you sure this is about protecting the pack? Or are you doing this because you’re scared of losing Aria to a man who can hold her properly?”*
I couldn’t answer. Because we both knew the truth.
*”Both,”* I finally admitted. *”I want to be able to protect my pack properly if Alpha Cross causes trouble at the ceremony. But I also… I want to be human when I bond with Aria. I want to be able to look her in the eyes without her having to stare up at a giant wolf. I want to speak to her with my own voice, hold her with my own hands, show her what I could be if this curse wasn’t between us.”*
“That’s honest, at least.” Nina stood, brushing off her knees. “I’ll talk to Eliza. See what she thinks about the risks involved. But Kael, you need to prepare yourself for the possibility that breaking the curse won’t change anything. If Aria doesn’t love you, shifting to human form isn’t going to magically make her feel differently.”
*”I know.”*
But at least I’d have tried. At least I’d have given myself every possible advantage instead of watching her slip away because I couldn’t compete with a man who had everything I lacked.
Nina left to find Eliza, and I remained in her office, staring at the wall and trying not to think about what I’d felt through the bond. The way Aria’s heart had broken when Damon mentioned their dreams for the future. The way she’d wanted, just for a moment, to believe he’d changed.
The way she’d looked at him with eyes that still held love, even through all the pain and anger.
I was falling for her. Deeply, irrevocably falling for the woman who’d saved my life, who’d agreed to bind herself to a cursed Alpha, who was trying so hard to be the Luna my pack needed.
But I was terrified that when she looked at me, all she saw was a way out of Blackwood. A fresh start that had nothing to do with actually wanting me.
And in two days, I’d find out if I was right.
Two days until the blood moon ceremony that would either give me everything I wanted or confirm that I was nothing more than a convenient escape for a woman who’d never stopped loving someone else.
The weight of that uncertainty was crushing.
Through the bond, I felt Aria’s presence somewhere in the pack lands – still a tangle of confused emotions, still processing what had happened at the border. I wanted to reach out to her, to offer comfort, to ask if she was okay.
But Nina’s advice held me back. Give her space. Let her figure out what she really wanted without me pressuring her, demanding answers she might not have.
So instead, I curled up on the floor of Nina’s office and waited. For Eliza’s consultation about the moonbeam treatment. For Aria to come back from wherever she’d gone to think. For the next two days to pass so I could finally know whether the woman I was falling in love with would actually choose me.
Or if I was about to have my heart broken by a mate who’d never really been mine to begin with.
ARIA
The spring falls had become my refuge over the past week – a hidden gem Nina had shown me on my second day in Shadowmere territory. The water cascaded down smooth rocks into a crystal-clear pool, surrounded by ancient trees that seemed to hold secrets in their gnarled branches. It was peaceful here. Quiet. The perfect place to fall apart without witnesses.
I sat on the flat rock overlooking the pool, my legs pulled up to my chest, and let the tears fall freely.
I couldn’t believe that had just happened. After years of hoping, praying, dreaming – Damon had finally said the words I’d been desperate to hear. He loved me. He wanted me. He was willing to break his bond with Sera, to fight for me, to give me everything I’d ever wanted from him.
And it was too late.
Too late, and for all the wrong reasons.
He hadn’t chosen me because he’d suddenly realized my worth. He’d chosen me because he was losing me. Because I’d finally stopped waiting around for him to notice me, had finally found somewhere else to belong, and his ego couldn’t handle it.
The realization made me cry harder, my shoulders shaking with sobs I’d been holding back since the border confrontation. All those years I’d wasted loving him. All those nights I’d lain awake wondering what I could do differently to make him see me. All those times I’d watched him with Sera and felt like my heart was being ripped from my chest.
And now he wanted me. Now, when it was too late. When I’d already committed to another Alpha, another pack, another life entirely.
“Why couldn’t you have chosen me before?” I whispered to the waterfall, my voice breaking. “Why did you wait until I was gone to realize what you’d lost?”
The water offered no answers. Just the steady rush of its fall, eternal and unchanging, indifferent to the drama of one omega’s broken heart.
Part of me – a treacherous, foolish part – wanted to run back to the border. To tell Damon I’d changed my mind, that I’d wait for him to break his bond with Sera, that we could finally have the life I’d dreamed about. The pups we’d planned to name Luna and Oak. The future we’d mapped out in late-night conversations that had meant everything to me and apparently nothing to him until I was no longer available.
But I couldn’t do that.
I wouldn’t do that.
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