Red?? What the hell?
They’re not red. They can’t be. No one has red, never in all the times, and notes, and books, and packs, and clans, and history, of our kind. I’ve never heard of it and it dawns on me, the elders have forgotten about Colton’s pointing it out that day. It was never mentioned again, or maybe they thought he was mistaken, or maybe they were so preoccupied by the fact he almost marked me right under their noses and that was far mor pressing an issue. I mean it’s ludicrous.
Our eyes are amber. They can’t be any other color. It’s not a thing… this is not a thing!!!
I start panicking, pulling myself back to the mirror in a bid to force myself to bring them back, but that ingrained terror running through me stops it from happening. I don’t know what to do or what it means.
Am I sick? Is there something wrong with me? I’ve no idea what to think and I pace insanely, flustered and freaking out, heart close to popping an artery as it thunders insanely in my chest. My brain spinning nauseatingly that maybe there is something really, really wrong with me. I didn’t think anything of it when Colton said, it to be frank, I thought he was tripping and not seeing clearly. That somehow with all the chaos, the drama, the heavy emotions swirling around, he saw red because of his own rage and mood at the time.
I should go to the medic, right? I should call the Shaman, maybe he will know?
My breathing’s shallow as my lungs burn with the effort to get oxygen, wringing my hands and running my fingers through my hair as I try to self-regulate the insane pounding of my heart. My blood pressure hiking and I start to feel woozy, nauseous, skin bristling with searing temperature as I lose control. I mean I feel like I’ve just found out I have cancer, or a deadly virus that’s incurable, or that Armageddon is on its way and we have nowhere to run.
I need to calm down. If I don’t, I might turn, and in a blind haze go do something stupid. We’re not supposed to turn if we feel like we can’t control it. That’s when bad things happen, wolves do terrible, awful things, to the humans nearby. Frenzied, blood lusted murderous things and then have no memory after.
I have to breathe and slow it down. Except I can’t. I’m spiraling and I flop down on the ground pathetically, crumpling as my legs give out from shaking crazily, clutching my head in a bid to force myself to focus on my breathing. Face planking the floorboards in an effort to get a grip on reality.
What’s wrong, Lorey. What is it? Talk to me. I can feel your panic and your fear. What’s happening, baby. What’s going on?
His voice renders me momentarily stupefied and I snap up, spinning around on my ass, looking for the intruder before sense tells me he is inside my head.
Colton? Why’re you in my head?
I blanche and press my hands to the sides of my skull and slump back down to put my face between my knees. To continue trying to regulate my breathing once more, confused he linked after the two-week silence of rejection I’ve just endured, and still caught up in my own meltdown.
I told you. I can feel you freaking out. You’re afraid. What is it? Tell me. If you need me, my help, I need to know where you are. What’s happening.
The sob that bursts from my throat as he says the words I have been longing to hear since I last saw him, breaks me all over again. That care and need to protect me, because despite rejection, he still has the urges of a mate. I blurt out my worry and break into over emotional terrified tears, fueled by knowing I’m a freak with blood colored eyeballs.
My EYES are RED!! I think there is something seriously wrong with me. I snort, and wail into the emptiness of my room, gripped with actual devastation. Really not all too focused on the fact that he’s actually talking to me, because this is bigger, scarier, and overwhelming.
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