“I’m being smart…. it’s not that I think we’ll fail! I have to make sure that if we do, the pack have a plan, have some place to aim if everything goes wrong. I need to pay attention to the details in the way Colton would. He always has a backup plan, always covers all bases.”
I’m doing what a Luna does. Preparing for the worst. Putting provisions in place should my people be left without Luna, Alpha, or Rema, or any of the strongest that have protected them most of their lives. I have chosen a wolf as beneficiary to stay behind and oversee the financial security of the pack, the making sure they have all they need. They will be the one that is left with my instructions to carry out should we perish out there.
“It feels like tempting fate and signing off on our death certificates.” Meadow breaks loose and walks away from me and stalks to the tree line, gazing out into the fog. She shudders when the dark shadows that always linger and wait out there flash past eerily, her face paling as she recognizes the one she can’t bear to look at. Unlike me, Meds actively avoids seeing her mate out there. She can’t handle it and wants to pretend he’s asleep somewhere and not here like this. They are always watching, always waiting, poised for our take down and it adds to the growing unease in our homestead.
“The fates are on our side. They wouldn’t have sent us to fetch Leyanne if they weren’t. I have faith in what they plan…… please Meds, have faith in me.” I ask of her, my voice laced with conviction that I don’t truly feel, and Meadow slumps down into the grass, tugs at stems and throws them into the airless space around her.
“You sound more like him every day. He even said the same thing to me the day he defeated his father…. ‘have faith in me’…. Look where that got us, huh? God, that boy… I miss him so much. I miss my Cesar. I miss all of them. Even those stupid twins and all their frustrating antics. I feel like my heart is ripped apart and the pieces were left scattered someplace cold.” Her tears fall fast, a watery smile appearing on her face as she reminisces over our sub pack and then frowns as the pain of their memory aches all over again.
Her words warm me though and somehow give me some pride. That maybe Colton, he would be a little proud of how I was holding this together. That enough of him rubbed off on me that it’s somehow getting me through even though he’s not with me to hold me up. Colton is a leader, to the core. I learned from the best and if I can only be a fraction of what he is, then I will never fail. Our sub pack and our boys will come home if I can be anything like he is.
Preparation
“Has Leyanne said how much longer she needs?” I pull us back to our topic in hand, walking to her and kneeling to meet her face and Meadow deflates completely.
“She’s ready to go whenever we are. She’s as ready as she can be, and they’re going over the same things until we say it’s happening.” That downward shuffle of her eyes tells me this is a confession of sorts. I eye her up and know with that admission that Meadow is the one who has delayed things. Knowing she didn’t want me to be a part of this, she’s made sure I thought there was still time to change the plan. Maybe she was holding out for the vampires to pull back and for the high lord to intervene… either way, I can tell she’s kept this close to her chest, so I won’t push us to do it.
This girl! Protecting me even by delaying reunion with her own mate. I can’t be mad at her for that.
“So…. by day or night? Which works in our favor.” I don’t intend to argue over this with her or make her feel worse or get bogged down in these emotional details. I need us to do this and stop the climbing anticipation and anxiety from growing further.
“Day… it separates them. Wolves to the woods, Vampires to the mountain. Even if the wolves follow us, it still makes it less likely of encountering them all out here in the space when our goal is the mountain. We may not be enough to fight them all once when we get there, but the witch just needs her moment. We need to distract and give her a little time. Once she breaks the spell, the wolves come back to us, and the vampires become less of a problem when we want to leave. We need to hold our own until she does what she needs to do.” Meadow stops crying, pulls herself together and sits up to gaze at me. My bossy commander coming back to me when she knows she must accept and get on with her duty.
“And how many of us do we have that are capable of helping and not hindering?” I ask gently, knowing all this she has kept quiet from me until now.
“We have less than a dozen who are fight ready, but we can make up numbers to two dozen with males from the village who are willing to try. The stronger ones… faster ones, and some with unique gifts.”
My heart sinks and my pulse quickens, knowing that’s less than I hoped for.
“Against dozens of our own… we’re still going to be so small. Outnumbered by our fiercest. God, how did we let this happen?” The despair rings in my tone, no need to pretend I am not freaking out in front of her, because she knows it too. Meadow rubs her face, sighing heavily to calm herself and grabs my hand to reassure me.
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