He doesn’t look at me when I stop beside him. He just stares out toward the forest like it might offer him an escape.
“You okay?” I ask.
He laughs bitterly. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
I shrug, giving him time to decide if he wants to talk. The silence is brief before Remy exhales and shakes his head. “I can’t do this anymore, Parker. I can’t keep pretending I’m fine when I’m not.”
“I know,” I say softly.
His eyes finally meet mine. They’re bloodshot, like he’s barely slept. “Do you?”
“Yes, I’ve known for a while.”
His shoulders stiffen. “Known what?”
“That you’re in love with him.”
He blinks, then swallows hard, his voice cracking as he says, “I never meant for it to happen.”
“I know,” I say. “We don’t get to choose these things, these feelings.”
“And you’re not disgusted with me?” he asks.
I smile at him softly, resisting the urge to hug him. “Of course not, you’re my brother. I will never stop supporting you, especially not over who you love. Hell, I wouldn’t even care if it’s the Grinch, just as long as you are happy.”
He nods slowly, looking down. “It’s pathetic. We made rules to avoid this. I’ve tried to stop. I’ve tried to hate him. I even thought about leaving the pack for a while, but I can’t. Nothing is going to work.”
The pain in his voice guts me. I step closer but don’t touch him. He’s too raw. Too breakable in this moment, and he isn’t much for physical affection. He never has been.
“He’s not mine,” Remy whispers. “He never was. I’m trying to accept it… but last night…”
His voice falters, and he turns away like he can’t bear for me to see his face.
“You heard them,” I finish for him.
He nods. “I tried to drown it out. I went for a run, but I was too close when they when it started. I heard everything. Parker. Every f*cking sound. Every moan, and I just broke. I sat in the woods and I broke”
My throat tightens. 1 know.” I admit. “I was going to come to you, but I figured you wanted to be alone.” “He chose her,” he says bitterly. “He chose her and I shouldn’t even be angry, because she’s good. She’s so f*cking good for him, and he’s crazy about her already. I see it in his eyes, but I..” His voice cracks. “I loved him first.”
“I know you did,” I whisper.
Remy drags a hand down his face. “And he knows it. I might not have said it, but he knows how I feel. He always has. Maybe that’s why he kept me close, or maybe he was just trying not to hurt me. But I can’t do it anymore. I can’t keep pretending
I’m just the loyal beta, the friend, the one who’ll always be there.
“You don’t have to pretend,” I say.
He shakes his head again, his voice barely audible. “He used to look at me like I was enough, like I mattered. I don’t think he will even see me now. Not really.”
I step forward and place a hand on his shoulder. “Remy, you’re not invisible, he’s sees you.”
His eyes finally lift to mine, full of grief and years of buried emotion. “I would’ve given him everything I have. Would have done anything he asked. I knew this day would likely come, but I didn’t expect him to dismiss me so quickly, to be so happy about it.”
“I know.”
Remy pulls in a shaky breath, and I can see how close he is to crumbling again. I should leave it. I should let him have this quiet grief and not drop another emotional bomb on top of the mess we’re already in. But this might be how I can help him. This might be how I fix it for him.
A tear runs down his cheek, and he doesn’t wipe it away. “What do I do, Parker? How do I let him go?”
I have to tell him. I know this could completely break him if I’m wrong, but he deserves honesty, and he deserves hope, too..
“There’s something I haven’t told you,” I say quietly.
“What is it?” He asks, a conflicted expression on his face, like he’s unsure if he wants to hear it or not.
I swallow hard, the words trying to stick in my throat. “She’s my mate too.”
His whole body goes still.
“I felt the bond,” I admit.
Remy doesn’t speak, doesn’t move. Just breathes, shallow and silent.
“I think she could be yours too, Rem.”
“She’s not,” he whispers. “She’s going to take everything from me, isn’t she?”
Chapter
“No, Rem, if I’m right, then she may just give you everything you want. If you just give her a chance.”
“How?” He snaps, “she’s going to take you all from me and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it!”
“There’s still room for you.” I say softly.
“You think Callen can’t love more than one person? We’ve always expected our future mate to be open to loving more than one of us, so why can’t Callen, too? If all four of us are her mates, then you get him too, Rem. You will be bound together for life by her, and I think she is the kind of woman that would accept what you and Callen have.”
Rem shakes his head. “You paint a pretty picture, brother, but you’re forgetting something… she isn’t my mate. I haven’t felt a single hint of a bond with her.”
“That’s because you haven’t given her a chance. When you see her, all you see is red. You only see what she is taking, and not giving her the opportunity to show you what she could be offering. You’ll never sense the bond with her if it’s masked by the pain and hatred you are carrying,” I try to explain.
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