He takes his fingers away from my mouth and kisses me. “Want to get breakfast?”
“Um.” I try to swallow down the lump in my throat. While spending the entire weekend with Brick like he’s an actual boyfriend has huge appeal, I just… can’t.
It’s not the right move to make. It’s not smart or practical.
Being with Brick is starting to hurt my heart-I’m falling for him. Not the fantasy of him but the real man. And I know this won’t last. It can’t. A billionaire from a long line of wealth and status doesn’t slum long-term.
I know what I need to do here. “I think you should go,” I say. “I need some time to think.”
He studies me. “About me?”
My heart flip-flops in my chest. “Yeah,” I say softly.
He draws away, his face impassive as he climbs out of the bed and pulls on his undershirt and boxers, then tuxedo pants and shirt, which he leaves unbuttoned. I’m already sorry for pushing him away, even though I know it’s the right thing to do.
“Somehow I think you’ve already made up your mind. Let’s have it, Windows.”
“I don’t think we should have sex any more.” I pluck the sheet up to cover my breasts.
He shoves his hands in his pockets and tilts his head. “Odd timing for that pronouncement.” His gaze roves over my bare shoulders. “Considering.”
Considering he just made me come three times. Yeah, I know. Sue me.
“It’s just getting too intense.”
“Too intense,” he echoes hollowly.
“Listen, I like my job,” I tell him. “I’d like to keep it. Is, ah, that possible?”
Annoyance flickers over his face. “Of course it’s possible, Windows.” He stares at me for a moment, revealing nothing of his thoughts, then shoves his feet into his shoes, picks up the tuxedo jacket, and walks out.
Ouch. That…sucked.
“I’m sorry.” I speak the flat words to the shut door. He’s already gone.
I thought I would feel relieved, especially because I still have the job-which I really have come to love. Instead, an unfamiliar anxiety brews in the pit of my stomach.
Like I made a mistake. And I rarely make mistakes. I’m allergic to them.
A moment later, Aubrey throws my door open and launches onto my bed in her
Women are fragile like a bomb t-shirt and purple lace panties. “Oh my God! What is wrong with you? I didn’t even know Brick Blackthroat was in our apartment. You could’ve texted or something!”
I fall back on the bed and throw an arm across my face. “I’m sorry! I’m an asshole. Did he see you in your underwear?”
“Well, yeah! Not that I care. It just was a shock. I mean, I thought you were going to walk out of your room and instead it’s this broad-shouldered billionaire asshole in a tux looking like he just ate a lemon.”
“He’s not an asshole.” I’m surprised at the rush of defensiveness that wells up in me at her dig. “And the lemon-face was because I just told him I didn’t want to have sex anymore.”
“That seems like odd timing. Did you say it right after doing it?”
I guess she heard.
Aubrey sits on the bed.
“Yes. He found the timing unusual as well.”
“So what happened?”
“Nothing. I mean, it was just getting to be too much, you know? Him coming over here and asking me to invite him up. He’s not what I thought-he’s really not a dick. I mean, he certainly can be, but not to the people he cares about. Like his sister and niece and nephew and…”
Aubrey’s dark head pops up from the pillow. “And?”
I try to fight back the irrational sensation of panic rising in my chest. “I don’t know!” I throw my hands in the air. “Maybe me!”
Aubrey gives me an exaggerated jaw drop with an extended gasp.
“Stop it.”
“You just broke it off because you’re afraid he cares about you?”
“Well, no. I mean, yes.” I try to organize my thoughts. “No! I broke it off because I care whether he cares, and that’s a real problem.”
“You know…there are no guarantees in love.” Aubrey props her cheek on her hand.
“Please don’t.”
She laughs. “I’m just saying. You’re trying so hard to protect yourself, but is it worth it?”
“There was no love
! This was my winter fling, remember? And now it’s over.”
“Okay, that’s legit. So did you quit the job, too?”
“No, he said I can keep the job.”
“Well, of course. He’d better say that, or he’d have a lawsuit on his hands. You can’t require a woman to have sex to keep a job. Which I know you know.”
“Right.” I throw off the sense that I made a mistake along with the covers and climb out of bed, grabbing a shirt to pull over my head, so Aubrey doesn’t have to look at me stark naked. “So it’s all good. I had some great boss sex and now I’m taking a break. End of story.”
“And you could probably always hit that again anytime you wanted to. You know, just for sex-sake. Sex-sake…” she repeats. “I just made up a new word.” She grins at me, and a bit of my dark mood lifts.
Not at the prospect of renewing things with Brick. That would be a bad idea. But it’s nice to know I could choose it if I really wanted to. That it’s still an option. Because Aubrey’s right. It’s not like I just broke Brick’s heart. He didn’t even argue with me-he knew it had to end at some point, too. This was just about sex. Things were getting out of that realm, so we needed to take a break. Once the distance has built back up between us, maybe we can indulge again. Not often-just once in a while.
My heart picks up speed at the idea of it not being completely over-further sign that I really am in too deep and can’t manage what we had.
I need to take a breather. Maybe date some other men. Remind myself that Brick is not the kind of guy you dream about keeping.
Not even close.
Brick
Bloody prints mar the snowpack all around the Berkshire cottage. I’ve run until my paws bled for the last two days trying to keep my wolf at bay. He wants blood although it’s unclear who I should attack.
Myself for not fighting for Madison? But how would that work? I can’t offer her more. I’m not human. I can’t buy a diamond engagement ring for the first woman I’ve slept with who feels like my equal.
Because Madison’s not my equal. She’s a terrible match for me simply because she’s a different species. We come from different worlds. She thinks it’s because of money and station, but it’s far deeper than that.
It’s biology.
Culture.
And to be with her, I’d have to forsake my entire family and pack. Something I’m not willing to do.
This termination of our sexual arrangement was inevitable. Probably better it came sooner than later.
My phone rings for the hundredth time. The guys have been blowing it up. Me leaving the party early wasn’t a shocker to them, but not answering their texts asking where I went is out of character. Now it’s Sunday night, and they haven’t heard from me, so I suspect they’re starting to worry. Enough that Ruby called Liz this afternoon to make sure I’m here.
This time it’s Billy. Since my wolf wants his blood, I pick up. “What?”
“Is…everything okay?”
I nearly crush my phone. “No, you asshat. I’m going to snap your neck when I see you.”
“Okay,” he says carefully. “Is this about the secretary?”
The outer case of the phone cracks.
“I told you not to call her that.”
“Madison,” he amends. “I’m sorry, Alpha.”
“Don’t
Alpha me. You obviously have no shred of respect for me or my position, or you wouldn’t interfere in my personal fucking business.”
Billy’s smart enough to keep his mouth shut. He’s lucky we’re having this conversation over the phone, or he’d be under my paws right now, bleeding from my fangs.
It gives me a moment to get my wolf’s rage back under control.
“You ever speak disrespectfully to her again, and I will cut off your fucking ears.”
I mean it.
Of course they would grow right back. Shifters have instant healing properties-another trait that makes us far superior to humans.
“Understood. I will…apologize.” He says the last word like his mouth is full of thistles.
“You won’t go near her again. There’s no need. You succeeded in humiliating her, and she ended it.”
I’m giving Billy too much credit. She didn’t end things because of him, but it gives me a cheap satisfaction to have someone besides myself to blame for it.
Madison has been well-defended from the beginning, and I’ve done nothing to knock down those walls. Given her nothing. Made her no promises. Of course she broke it off when we started to experience real affection for each other. But what could I offer her?
“Arrange the trip to Sweden for the Winter Pack Games.”
“Consider it done.” Billy wisely keeps the chortle of glee out of his voice, but I can imagine his triumphant expression. Cock sucker.
It only adds to my piss-off that he was probably right all along. I need to stop wasting my attention on my beautiful assistant and expend every effort to find an alpha she-wolf to mate.
If I don’t, I will be consumed by moon madness.
Madi
“Windows.” Blackthroat stands in the doorway of his office instead of calling me on the intercom. He’s shadow-eyed again today, his expression stamped in a deep scowl. It appears he forgot to shave this morning, or he slept at the office because his jaw is stubbled with more than a five o’clock shadow.
He’s truly been on a rampage-firing ten people in the two days he’s been back since the weekend. I’ve heard him slamming and throwing things in his office. Pacing. Raising his voice on the phone. Barking at nearly everyone, including his executive team.
Unbelievably, none of his anger has been directed toward me. It’s almost like he’s purposely walking on eggshells. With me, he’s been totally civil-bordering on polite.
I can’t quite decipher it. Surely he doesn’t believe I would ever file a sexual harassment suit against him. I know I tossed out the notion of me being unfireable after that first time we had sex, but I would never use that against him.
“Yes, sir?”
“Aiden Adalwulf sent me an offer for the Adirondack property. Call him and set up a meeting.”
My brows shoot up. “You’re selling the property you just bought, sir?”
He tugs at the blue striped tie like it’s too tight, even though it’s already much looser than he usually wears it. “Tell him this is his one and only chance to buy it. If he brings me a certified check in the mid eight figures this afternoon, I won’t sell it to the other bidder.”
“Is there another bidder, sir?”
Three months ago I wouldn’t dare ask questions about his business. Three months ago, he would have shredded me like confetti for doing so. Now, though, he simply shakes his head. “There is not. I’m sweating him for sport.”
He seems to be sweating everyone for sport this week.
My beautiful, sadistic boss.
This version of Blackthroat informed my first impression of the man when I came to work at Moon Co. The heartless, callous, pompous Wall Street CEO out for blood all as a form of entertainment.
Is it weird that in addition to finding it sexy in an anti-hero sort of way, I now find him completely relatable? That’s frightening. I probably should get off Wall Street before I become like these people.
“Madison?”
I pause with my hand mid-air, already reaching for the phone to call Aiden. Blackthroat’s tie is eskew, and his hair looks like he’s been tunneling fingers through it. “Yes, sir?”
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