“I see the remnants of the little girl that used to run around and play with everybody. The one that used to beg to train with me in her princess dress. I see the teen that cared for everybody and wanted to help in anyway she can. I finally see you again LeeAca.” My dad speaks up leaving me speachless. What is he talking about I haven’t changed my wolf and I are still the same monster that people are terrified of. I only nod and hug them then go to find Amara and Laura.
Towards the end of the night I walked towards the apartment. I can focus on the emotions and I can feel love and lust in the apartment. I decide to leave them be. They will have a long night ahead of them. I sigh and go to the kitchen. There are still a few people hanging around in the main rooms, so I grab a bottle of my whiskey stash and a cup and head towards the garden. I find a spot that is secluded and sit down. I look up at the stars and exhale a deep breath. I pour myself a glass of whiskey and down it. I don’t really feel anything so I put down another one. When I feel the warmness it gives me I sit back against a rock and focus on my breathing. I hear the crunching of the gravel a little away and decide to ignore it. Maybe whoever it is will go away. I grab another glass and down it when the person gets close enough for me to smell. I don’t want to talk with anybody right now, let alone him. I don’t understand what he is doing out here anyway. I hear him get closer to me and stop.
“What are you doing out here?” Alarick asks me and I sigh as he sits down next to me. I hold up my glass to him then toss it back.
“You know that won’t do anything for your nerves.” He says and I scoff at him. I don’t have nerves. I am trying to numb my pain. Him being here isn’t helping it. I pour another glass and hand it to him. I see him swirling it around and smelling it, like it really makes a difference. I roll my eyes and tip the bottle to him and chug some. I giggle a little at the warm feeling I am getting. He looks at me curiously then drinks the glass. He makes a face at his then looks at me.
“How did you get this?” He asks accusingly.
“Looks like it didn’t work. You need another glass.” I slowly say and grab his glass and pur him another.
“What are you talking about?” He asks.
“You need to relax.” I say as I fill the glass to the brim this time and spill a little on my hand when passing it over to him.
“Aw sh*t.” I say and pout a little when he takes the glass I lick my hand to try and get the whiskey that spilled on it. No alcohol will be wasted by me. I look up to see him staring at me with an expression I can’t read.
“Drink up.” I say and I take the bottle and raise it to him. He shrugs and does the same with his glass. We both chug, I stop when he is done with his glass. He coughs a little then hands me the glass.
“Where did you get it?” He asks again but a little slower. I can feel his emotions dull a little.
“I have my ways.” I slur out and pour him another. He doesn’t say anything, just takes his glass and downs it then sets it off to his side. We both sit back and stare at the sky.
“Are you ready for tomorrow?” He asks and I sigh. I don’t want to talk about tomorrow. I have a bad feeling about it.
“No.” I say and I feel him look at me.
“What do you mean? Are you nervous?” He asks. I look at him
“Are YOU nervous?” I ask him and he stares at me. He sighs and runs a hand through his hair. I wish that could be my hand. No. No I don’t.
“Honestly, yes.” He says, which surprises me.
“I know. I am pretty unique. Can’t be replaced too easily.” I chuckle at my little self confidence.
“You are. I’ve gotten used to having you around. Now I am going to have to get used to somebody else.” He says smirking at me. My face fell, but before I could let him see I looked back to the sky. He doesn’t know that his words cause a little part of me to hurt. That is one of the reasons I am trying to drink away the pain. Not just the pain, emotions, all emotions. I take the bottle and drink more. I don’t want to feel. I feel his eyes on me and I look over to see him holding his glass. I shakily pour him one and it overflows. He chugs it then lays it back down to the side of him. I turn my attention back to the stars and sigh.
“Do you think she is laughing at us?” I ask, not taking my eyes off the sky.
“Who?” He asked me.
“The Moon Goddess. She plays her little games with people. Matching them up when she knows what will come of it? I think she enjoys our suffering. It is the only way to ensure people still turn to her for help.” I slur, I feel him look at me. “What?” I ask.
“Is your mate here?” He asks and I sigh.
“Yes.” I say and his eyes widen a little.
“Did something happen?” He asks and I shake my head.
“No. He doesn’t know I exist. It is better that way.” I say and I see him looking at me confused.
“Why is it better that way?” He asks.
“Why is he being all nosy?” Fen slurs in my head.
“Because I don’t want a mate. They either hurt you or make you weak.” I say and he nods his head in understanding. I have decided that I have had enough of this conversation and I try to get up. I lose my balance and fall over him. I fall on his lap with my belly on his thighs and a*s up.
“Stupid a*s dress.” I say under my breath and try to get up again. My hands grip his thighs for support and at this point I don’t care, I just want to get back to my room. I hear him suck in a deep breath and exhale when I am off of him. Damn I didn’t think I was that heavy. I start to walk toward the castle with my bottle in hand. I know I am stumbling around, but I don’t care.
“Maleena I am coming up, you better be decent. And if you’re not, go to his place.” I mindlink her. I feel sparks erupt through my arm and I yank it back causing me to stumble. Alarick is looking at me concerned.
“LeeAca. Are you okay?” He asks and I shake my head. Why won’t he just leave me alone?
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