“You’ve been skipping your medications and therapy sessions again?” Jasper’s voice broke through, his gaze heavy on me. But I turned my eyes elsewhere.
I didn’t like the way he looked at me. His eyes spoke of pity.
I didn’t want his pity.
“You know you have to be mentally stable in order to rule the pack.”
“I don’t care anymore!” I flared, punching the wall hard, feeling the sand-like grains fall onto my knuckles.
“I don’t think I can do this anymore.” With those words, I walked away from him, ignoring his calls as I made my way to my room, locking the door behind me.
Tears flooded my eyes as I stared at the large amount of wolfsbane I had saved in a jar. Maybe I should end it all.
Damon
My hands trembled as I pulled out a syringe filled with wolfsbane, preparing to inject myself with it. I made sure it was above my usual dosage.
A quick death would do.
I shut my eyes as the needle pressed into my skin, almost piercing my veins, when the syringe slipped from my hand and clattered to the floor.
I wasn’t afraid of death. In fact, I couldn’t wait to reunite with my brothers and my mate, but I was afraid of breaking Jasper’s heart.
After the ugly incident, he had been there for me, helping me battle my demons and making me a better person. He was the only one who didn’t see me as a madman, even though he knew I was one.
He was more than my best friend, more than my Beta. He was my brother.
Killing myself would only shatter his heart into pieces.
“A worthless madman like you doesn’t deserve to live. Pick it up!” a voice commanded, growling menacingly, as a strange breeze rolled the syringe to rest against my foot.
I recognized that voice. The voice of my demons.
“You are not a madman, Damon. I know that,” Ivy’s voice suddenly filled the room.
I turned my head to see her walking elegantly toward me.
“Don’t give in to your demons,” she instructed, her voice soft but authoritative. The effect rang in my head, erasing the suicidal thoughts that had consumed me.
As if under her spell, I picked up the syringe and the jar of wolfsbane, discarding them in my closet before turning to face her.
I missed her terribly and couldn’t help but long for her presence every day.
Sadness filled my heart in her absence.
“Ivy is not real,” Jasper’s voice flooded my mind again, stabbing at my already wounded heart.
She disappeared just as she had come.
A tear escaped my eye as I slumped down onto the couch.
Ivy is fucking real!
She visits me every time, making sure I am okay. We talk as if she’s right here with me. A ghost couldn’t do that, right?
Or was I losing my mind?
“Have you been skipping your medications and therapy sessions again?” Jasper’s voice pulled me from my thoughts.
I groaned. I was tired of living on drugs and therapy. All I wanted was a break.
I didn’t need medication or therapy to feel better.
I was the Alpha King.
“A madman isn’t fit to be the Alpha King,” a cracked voice echoed in my mind, followed by mocking laughter.
I clenched my fists. I wouldn’t give in to my demons.
I wasn’t mad.
Ivy was my witness. Jasper was my witness.
“They’re lying to you. You can’t even tell the difference between reality and imagination.” Another burst of laughter rang in my head, sending sharp pain through my skull.
Maybe it was right.
Denying the truth was useless.
If I wasn’t mad, then why did demons live rent-free in my head, taunting me?
Why was I interacting with ghosts?
“Alpha?”
A soft voice called to me, snapping me out of my spiraling thoughts. I jerked upright, my back pressing against the couch.
I lifted my gaze to see Rosa leaning against the doorframe, clad in sheer red lingerie that clung to her pale skin.
Her face was heavy with makeup, her hair tied in a high ponytail.
My cock twitched at the sight of her matching red bra and g-string-just the way I liked it.
Slowly, she made her way toward the table in front of me, swaying her hips, flipping her hair.
“My King,” she bowed in acknowledgment before lifting her eyes to meet mine.
She was one of the few who dared to look me in the eye.
Her friendship with Ivy had given her that privilege.
I wondered how she had coped with Ivy’s death.
Since her best friend, Ivy, died, she made it her duty to console me and help me move on. Soon, things got complicated, and we were stuck in an entanglement. Neither of us wanted to opt out of the complicated relationship.
The day Ivy died was the day I vowed to never make love to any woman. Her death brought out the cruel part of me. Rather than making love, which was more emotional, I fucked hard without any emotional attachment.
Rosa’s presence brought satisfaction to my new sex life. I became a BDSM addict.
Things happened fast, and Rosa became my mistress, satisfying my dark fantasies. Though I felt nothing for her, I found it hard to let her go after her vast experience in BDSM sex. Despite her laziness, she wasn’t totally useless.
Or was there something more to her staying in the castle?
“My King,” her seductive voice rang in my ears again as she licked her plump lips.
“What do you want?” I asked harshly, but she welcomed me with a warm smile.
What was the naughty girl up to this time?
“You’ve been stressed lately, so I thought you might need to relax.” Her voice was as gentle as a whisper in the breeze.
I watched her keenly, observing her next move.
Get out of my face, bitch!
“I didn’t call you, Rosa,” I said, narrowing my eyes before letting them rest on the door, indirectly telling her to leave.
“I know, my king. I also know you need something,” she said, climbing onto the table.
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