“That is enough, aunt,” Finlay said. He looked at me with worry. I understood he didn’t want to give me false hope, and I appreciated it. It had been hard to accept my fate and there wasn’t room for false hope.
“Very well,” she said with a nod. The topic was changed but during the next hour or so, many of the parents accepted my offer to watch over the pups. Cadence was thrilled. I promised him I would tell him some of the old stories my mother had told me when I was little and we could have snacks while we waited for the rest of the pack to return. It wasn’t long before Finlay stood up. The surrounding conversations stopped.
“It’s the full moon. Let’s head for the forest and run,” Finlay said and there were cheering and people started walking into the forest. “Will you be okay?” he asked me.
“Of course she will be,” Matilda huffed. “I’ll keep her company and help her keep an eye on the savages,” she added. Finlay looked at me and I gave him a smile and a nod. He headed for the forest, but stopped at the edge to look back before disappearing into the darkness. I held up my promise to Cadence and he and the other pups got to choose snacks, and sat down all around me and Matilda as I started to tell the old tales. After two stories, the younger pups had snuggled into blankets and were sleeping. The older ones were running around, enacting the battle scenes. “You have a good hand with pups,” Matilda said.
“I have had a lot of practice. As I don’t shift, I stayed behind with the pups in my old pack,” I told her. I was starting to get warm. Maybe I was sitting too close to the fire?
“How old were you when you left your own pack?” Matilda asked.
“Eighteen.” I looked around, making sure none of the pups were close by. “I was rejected by my mate,” I said. She looked as shocked as Finlay had.
“And you doubt your strength? You will find your way, and I’m sure the moon will give you a more deserving mate,” she told me and patted my leg. I gave her a smile. She was really sweet.
“Is the fire hot?” I asked, pulling my sweater over my head, leaving me in a tank top.
“Do you feel hot?” she asked.
“Yeah. And a little funky. Maybe I ate too many snacks with the pups?”
“How long have you been feeling like this?” she asked. I had to pause and think.
“I have been feeling a little restless all day, like I should remember something, but I have forgotten what. But the heat has only come the last thirty minutes or so,” I told her. She studied me and nodded.
“It will be fine. Just relax and don’t fight against it,” she said.
“Fight against what?” I asked as Finlay stepped out of the tree line. He was only wearing shorts, and I was confused by why he was back in his human form this early. He walked up to me and kneeled down in front of me, and placed a hand on my forehead.
“You are burning up,” he said and looked at his aunt. She nodded. What was that all about? “The others are coming as well,” he told me.
“Why?” I asked. Then there was a cramp in my stomach which took my breath away.
“You are turning, Armeria. And a pack should surround you when you have your first turn. It helps,” he said. I just stared at him like he had spoken Martian.
“Turning?” I asked.
“Your wolf is coming,” Matilda softly told me. More and more of the pack were walking out of the forest, all half dressed. Some of them gathered up the pups, others just gathered around us.
“Amie, do you remember what your parents told you about your first shift?” Finlay asked me, and my focus returned to him. No one had ever talked to me about my first shift. That was not how it was done in my old pack. When someone showed the first signs of shifting, they were taken by their parents or close relatives into the woods and then the next morning they were back. I shook my head.
“No one has told me anything,” I said as another cramp hit me. I didn’t miss the looks being exchanged between Finlay and his aunt.Finlay
How was I supposed to help Amie through her first shift when no one had told her what to expect? I didn’t know if we had time to explain it all. I felt my anger rise at how unfair it was to her. Hadn’t she suffered enough? When she told me the real reason why she had left her old pack, it almost broke my heart. I had known her for a couple of days and I already knew she was an amazing wolf. How someone who grew up with her couldn’t see it, I didn’t know. Her story had also pained me in a whole other way, a way that wasn’t the least logical. She had found her mate, it meant she wasn’t my mate. Which I knew. If she had been, I would have known as soon as I saw her in the diner. But somehow, a small part held out hope. Maybe because she didn’t have her wolf, it hadn’t clicked into place. It was stupid; I knew it didn’t work like that. But a part of me had held out hope, growing a little stronger with each new thing I learned about her. It didn’t make sense to be bitter at the moon goddess because she had paired Amie with someone so unworthy of her, instead of pairing her with me. But now was not the time to sulk over it. Amie needed me. She needed the pack. She may not be one of us, but I had hoped she would become one. And no matter what she decided, the first shift was hard and confusing. It was better to have a pack around you. I took her hand and she looked at me.
“Come, let’s go into the woods and I will tell you,” I said. She nodded and got up on shaky legs. Aunt Matilda walked on her other side and the two of us made sure she was steady. Around us, the pack walked. The ones that had got to know her, walked closest to us. I saw Medow holding a blanket and smiled. They would be there for Amie.
“Let’s stop in the clearing ahead,” my aunt said. I nodded. It was large enough and the forest floor was covered in soft moss. It was a good place.
“Amie, look at me,” I said, and she lifted her forest green eyes to me. “The first shift is not comfortable. Your body temperature will increase to speed up the changes to your body. There will be cramping in your muscles as they start to change. You will feel the bones breaking and rearranging. It isn’t fun, but it’s usually quick once it starts. Once the first time is over, it will never feel like that again. The next time you will hardly feel it,” I explained and saw her eyes grow big with fear.
“It will be fine, child. You are not alone. We will be with you,” my aunt said and guided Amie to sit down. I sat down next to her on the forest floor. She was looking around and her eyes stopped on Cadence.
“Even the pups?” she asked.
“Yes, they need to see and understand so they can be prepared when it’s their turn.” She nodded and closed her eyes as a tremor wrecked through her body. I felt helpless as I could do nothing for her. I had guided several of our younger pack members through their first change. But I had never felt like this before. Maybe it was because she was so unprepared, or maybe because I felt like life had handed her a bad hand until now. I don’t know why, but I struggled with keeping calm. The only thing stopping me from acting out was the knowledge that Amie needed my calm.
“Time to get out of your clothes, dear. Trust me, you don’t want to tear through them and end up walking back to the pack house wrapped in a blanket. Been there, done that, not worth it,” Matilda said. There were soft chuckles from the pack. Most wolves would rip through their clothes one time or another. Nudity wasn’t as big of a deal in werewolf society. But we still avoided going around naked if it could be helped. Matilda and Medow had helped Amie to stand and were helping her undress. The pack was looking away out of respect and even I lowered my eyes to give her some privacy. When she sank down to the ground next to me, she was wrapped in the blanket Medow had brought.
“Do you have any questions?” I asked her. She looked at me and shook her head. I could see the fear and confusion. “It will be okay. Unless you count that this means my aunt was right and that is a small catastrophe. She is far too used to being right all the time,” I tried to joke and got a smile from her. When a new set of cramps rolled through her, she grabbed my hand. “It’s okay. Lay down and try to relax. Don’t fight it.” I told her and she laid down. The pack drew closer and we all watched her as she did her best to relax. It didn’t take long for the shimmer to appear around her. It was close now. Her body shook and a low whimper escaped her as the first sound of snapping bones could be heard. As I watched on with worry, her porcelain skin began to disappear under thick fur. Before I knew it, the woman had been replaced by a wolf. The only thing visible was its head which was sticking out from the blanket. She was beautiful. The fur around her nose and eyes were a light strawberry blond and got darker the further away from the face it got. I could hardly wait to see the rest of her. “Amie, can you try to sit up?” I asked, knowing it was confusing to be in your other body the first time. She blinked at me with the same green eyes as always and sat up. She swayed a little, but soon became steady. The blanket pooled around her and we all got our first look at what hopefully would be our new pack member. Her body was covered in dark red fur, the tip of her tail and her paws were the same light colour as her face.
“She is so cute!” Cadence exclaimed and everyone chuckled. I could see the twinkle in Amie’s eyes and knew she didn’t take offence. But when the pup rushed forward to pet her, I stood up and blocked his path. I caught him and took him into my arms. Together, we looked down at Amie. When I stood, she almost reached my chest, sitting down. She wasn’t a small wolf.
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